Regular readers know that I try to avoid having more than one post a day, but this was special, the very first Lord Mayor of London ringing the 5 minute bell at Lords Cricket Ground to reopen England versus Sri Lanka. Chris Hayward in shot, but masterminded so kindly by Mark Berman.

But if you’d like some fun observations from the Smarmy Barmy Army sort at Z/Yen, then enjoy this piece. My thoughts have long been known:

Useful Commentary for Foreigners Watching Cricket Which Will Help Their English Hosts Realise Their Appreciation

• Hey, my money’s on the team in white too!
• When do they all shout “cricket”?
• I just love the sound of wicket on willow!
• How can they have a five day match and still not decide who won?
• Those two English guys have been in for an hour.  I just wish they would let the Australians bat too!
• Now I see why they call it a testing match!
• Isn’t it pleasant the way this rainstorm livens up the game.
• What lovely children’s sandwiches.
• Why doesn’t it end when it’s over?
• Due to the unexpected recurrence of a pathological childhood phobia I need to leave the stand.  In the words of your great Antarctic cricketer, LEG Oates, “I may be gone for some time” – like till tomorrow.